Writings by Susan Dickinson

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first page
But by the gods as he turned back toward the bow
of the boat who should he see but his neighbor
and in his own mind his avenger - Well early met
said the Judge - do you go to town so early at this hour often?
This is a new thing for me - glad of your company -
Close company he was too, till the boat bumped
the NY side - Desperate he ignored his bundle
risking life and limb he bestrode the safety rope
rushed for his car and sat down in breathless
victory - not yet Mr Jack the fine lawyer and
gentleman that you are for a street gamine sprang
upon the car with "You have left your meat
on the boat"! * When the apothecary politely
called isnt this yours Sir --- in his nervousness
he had really forgotten the thing - the horror --

second page
Once his avenger slipped from his arm
but was quickly restored as he stopped
to buy a basket of rare fruit for poor Kate
He was near deliverance and the boat
How beautiful life would be restored

third page
The house was still - servants in bed
not a sound in the world save the thumping of their
hearts & consciences as in smoking jacket &
pink negligee our[?] bearing a silver candle
stick aloft crept down the cellar stairs to
their secret burial - Nervous? Of course the "what
was that"? of the pink Kate as they went down
exciting to a quick Jack's strained nervous
system - It was a real Hogarthian picture
the black cellar for a background - the flickering candle
revealing in soft lights this dear handsome
young pair condescending to this repulsive job
with sickening disgust they cut the strings - un-
rolled the c[?] paper - and it was a
Leg of Lamb!

X Don't leave any articles
in the cars[?]

H bMS Am 1118.95, Box 9


first page

of wes Let me be after carrying the big bundle for ye Sir" "O really, thank you, No"
stammered Jack, - "It is important, - law papers --" he added vaguely, not wishing to
hurt the kindly old soul. but mentally saying "I'll linger behind and leave it on
the seat . I believe that's the Dr Judge himself in front this minute"! X

[pinned to page
X And by the Gods! as he turned toward the bon of the boat who should he see but
his neighbor, Well, well early met", said the Judge, cordially. "Do you go up on this
train often? It is a new thing for me, - glad I met you and can have your company".
It was close company too, till the boat bumped on the New York side. Desperate,
at having lost his chance to throw the bundle over board, Jack left it on the seat
right in the face of those stern warnings not to leave any aticles [sic] on the boat!]

"That is to be the end of this?" he groaned inwardly, "I have become the Eugene Aram
of my sex!" Buying some cologne in the first drug-shop, he decided to seek the
shelter of his office without further delay and think out his problem, when the
voice of the drug clerk aroused him -, politely calling as he was just shutting
the door "Is'nt this yours Sir?" In his preoccupied nervousneis [sic] he had almost
forgotten the thing, - the horror! It was a racking day, between his plans and his
failures. Once he determined to boldly hurl Mr Zoroaster from from [sic] the rear window
of his hall way. Nothing easier! Only on opening his door to be sure the coast was clear,
he met the janitor, who seemed to search him with a new gaze, - sort of "Thou-art-the
man"-expression! And as with a feint of business in the next office he passed on,
his heart cried out, "This life of deceit will kill me!" With a tumult of hopes and
fear: the day wore on. Night came. and the four facted? Persian philosopher was not
buried. In the darkness of the ferry he would have no trouble at all. After all
it was only a cat. Jack's spirits rose. He even whistled a bit of the last new
ballet he had seen and liked; sprinkling the cologne freely about. Sure of speedy

[pinned to page:
* Once his avenger slipped from his arms as he stopped? to buy a basket of rare
fruit for poor Kate, but the package was quickly restored to him. However he was
nearing deliverance now. How beautiful life would be without the secret that one
could not lose!]

second page

kindly mood of companionship and kept close to the suffering man's side | the side
beginning to ache under the inanimate life he was lugging about. He abandoned
hope as thoroughly now as ever did Dante's disciples on entering purgatory, deciding to
wait and make his last throw in the dead of night. If the meaningless warning of the
brakeman, not to leave any articles in the oars, had jarred on his nerves earlier in
the day, imagine with what a screech of irony they sounded to him now!

Not until he reached his own door was the world really left to darkness and to him.
Of course all the reactionary experience of his survival "cum" the cat, can be more? easi
imagined than described. Kate burst into tears, - the palliative of all dear women, -
only to be suddenly roused by her fears to [?] thoughts of escape. The destroyer of their
peace was carefully put in the ash barrel in the darkest cellar, where they agreed
they would bury Zoroaster at the midnight hour," when cats run home and owls to whit
in who" [?] They would bury him they agreed in a grave bigger than the Heidelburger tun wrong[?], to an obliv
beyond any Nirvana known to his philosophical ancestors.

The house was still; servants in bed; when not a sound in the world, beyond the
thumping of their hearts and consciences, as in smoking jacket and pink negligee',
bearing a silver Candle sticks alopt [sic], they crept down the callar [sic] stairs to their
secret burial. Nervous? Of course. The; "what was that?" of the pink Kate as they
made their descent, exciting Jack's strained nervous system to a quiver! It was a real
Hogarthian picture; the black callar for a background, the flickering candle revealing
in soft lights their anxious dear handsome faces, condescending to this repulsive task.
Then with sickening disgust they cut the strings, unrolled the paper, and it was a
Leg of Lamb.!!

March 1910 -

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Writings by Susan Dickinson Main Page
Image reproduced by permission of the Houghton Library, Harvard University, and Brown University Libraries. Not to be reproduced in whole or in part without permission.
Transcription and commentary copyright 1998 by Martha Nell Smith,
Laura Elyn Lauth, and Lara Vetter, all rights reserved
Maintained by Rebecca Mooney  <rnmooney@umd.edu>
Last updated on January 24, 2008

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